Loving Jesus.

How do you know if you love Jesus? Many people I've talked to say, "I love God!" or, "I love Jesus!" But how do you know if you love Him deep down? He sees into the very depth of your soul. He sees the horrible sins you haven't even committed yet. He sees the reason behind your every action, thought, and even movement. Since he knows literally EVERY single thing there is to know about you, how do you know when you love Him?

I don't know about you, but I feel like I don't even know myself. When I read the verses in the Bible which mention that He can see the deepest parts of who you are, I always wonder what my deepest secret is. Even I don't know the real reason behind my thoughts and actions most of the time. So, since I barely know myself, how can I answer honestly to the question, "Do you love Him?"

I suppose an intelligent way to approach this question, would be to look at what things describe love.
1) When you love someone, you are willing to do anything for them. .2)You're willing to drop your most important plans if something urgent or bad happens. .3) You listen to them, talk to them frequently, and keep in a good relationship with them. Some people, you love so much that you don't even want to go a day without telling them hello, or that you're thinking of them and you hope they have a good day. .4) But, when you talk to them you don't want to make it all about you, as this isn't a productive conversation, and will eventually bore them, and you don't want to weigh them down with all of your problems. You want to hear what they have to say, too. .5) You anxiously await the very moment that you get to see them next.

Now, let us analyze these things, and perhaps see if I possess any of these.
#1, I like to think that I would be willing to do anything Christ told me to do. He might have to tell me a couple times if it was something REALLY out there, because at first I would probably think it was my imagination. But I think that if I knew a command came from God, I would do it.
#2, Welll, I'm not sure what kind of bad thing would happen to Jesus, so I don't think that part applies, necessarily. But if there was something urgent He was calling me to do ASAP, would I drop everything I was doing at that point in my life, and do what he asked? Hmmmm.
#3, I am trying to talk to Him more often. Sometimes it's easy to get lost in life and start dragging behind on your prayer or devotions time, but lately I have been setting aside the time for it, because I know it's important for my relationship to grow in Him. And I do listen to His answers to the questions I ask him. (Like, for instance, when I asked why he liked to be praised all the time, which I blogged about in the past.)
#4, here's one that I might not be up-to-par on. When I pray, I usually ask for things. "Please help me with ___" or "Please be with _____ tomorrow." Now that I think about it, I just ask for things from Him quite frequently. I need to try for more of a two-way conversation, rather than one which is so one-sided.
#5, I do await the moment I can see Jesus Christ in person. Just imagining it in my head excites me. I have so many things I'd like to ask Him, and I would love to ask to be forgiven. I know that I already am forgiven, but I think that if I asked him face-to-face, and he looked me straight in the eye and said, "Caitlin, I forgive you for everything." That would be so powerful. And I look forward to just being able to run to his arms and hug Him.

So, it looks as if I possess three of the top five things that I believe show love? That figure isn't so bad. And of course the whole walk with Him is a journey.  Maybe along the way I will just know. I'll just know when He is my every waking thought, or the One whom I do everything for. I hope that I grow to be that way, because as of right now, I feel as if I am leaving a bit to be desired in this relationship.